Still Thrilled

Y'all are so patient. Overall my story is great and interesting. Leukemia's awesome like that. But on an ongoing, every day basis, even I get tired of the story. There's more to life than blood counts, hemorrhoids, and trying to jog.

Yosemite, kind of a perfect picture for this post. You may be able to see two of my sons in the lower center.

But that gives me a boatload to talk about!

We all have to get up and do the mundane every day. Now as for me, my days aren't all the same because I at least have the surprise of how I'm going to feel each morning, which is always different. Leukemia's awesome like that.

So when every day seems the same, and you wonder what you're supposed to be doing with your life, what keeps you going?

Here's the things I think make life worth living even when every day seems the same:

• My wife and kids
• Friends and neighbors
• The young people I work with
• The not-so-young people I work with
• Memories and good times with all the above
• Walking in nature - it somehow always makes me remember life isn't really about getting things done.

I'll save the "Leukemia's Awesome Like That" post for tomorrow. Y'all have to help me with today's post. When everything seems the same every day, what would you list as making life worth living?

Don't Be Still, My Beating Heart

Just had to share this video, which a friend of mine—a fellow cancer patient, feel free to pray for Ashimah, too, please—posted on Facebook.

I've never seen a news crew just stare speechless at a camera before.

The story's merely very good until the stethoscope enters the video. Then it's breathtaking. I made the mistake of watching it after midnight and very tired. It makes it very hard to maintain machismo.

Watch it here.

Great Article on a Potential Cancer Cure

Quite a number of people sent me links to various news stories on an amazing new treatment for cancer that was tested on three leukemia patients ... successfully!

The three patients were chronic leukemia patients, which is a significantly different disease than the acute leukemia I have, but the articles cover a therapy that is nonetheless extremely important for not only leukemias in general, but cancers in general.

Today another person sent me a link to an article about this treatment, which involves using the HIV virus (yes, the one that causes AIDS) to transport genes into T-cells, transforming those T-cells into cancer killers. This particular article is well-written and easy to read, very interesting, so I'm passing it on to you:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/13/health/13gene.html

Remission

I'm feeling pretty energetic today. Yesterday was really rough.

Sometimes I analyze things so much I miss the obvious. I spent yesterday wondering why I was so fatigued. My red blood cell counts really weren't low enough to justify the exhaustion ... and even a little bit of confusion. I wondered if maybe the Neulasta shot from Saturday was making my body work so hard that I didn't have energy for other things.

It could have been a lot easier. I could have thought, "Wow. I'm really tired. I need a nap. People on chemo need more sleep than normal."

I got a long and good night's sleep last night. I feel way better.

Sometimes the obvious is hard to see.

Did you know Americans don't rest enough? We think that if we keep going, we'll get more done. Sometimes stopping is the best way to get things done. I have that American insanity—just keep going till you drop—as bad as anyone.

Get some rest.

Remission

A friend sent me a text about the use of the word "remission" in a Bible verse. Usually, it's understood to simply be a synonym for "forgiveness." My friend, however, was thinking about it in the context of my remission from leukemia, and he told me about it.

It really got me thinking.

I wrote a blog post on it, but since the post is focused on following Christ, not leukemia, I thought it fit better on my The Rest of the Old, Old Story blog than here. Since it was inspired by leukemia, I am linking it from here, though, for those of you that want to read it.

The Nature of Inspiration

Some days I write on the blog because it's wise to keep it going. Yesterday was one of those days where it was good to just get a blog post up.

Today I'm writing because of things I'm thinking about, both humorous and profound.

On the humorous side, I saw my blood counts this morning. Those blood-building shots work REALLY well on me.

The Neulasten shot I got Saturday was meant to prevent my white blood cell counts (WBC) from getting too low. Low would be if my WBC dropped below 4,000. Even 4,000 wouldn't be too bad. Keeping it above 1,000 or 2,000 so that my neutrophils wouldn't drop below 500 would be sufficient. (Neutrophils are one of the white blood cells, so the Absolute Neutrophil Count, or ANC, is a portion of the WBC.)

My white blood cell count is 25,300. My neutrophil count is 24,000.

I guess we're okay for now.

Jerry's News

I just got a text from Rayetta, Jerry's wife, letting me know that he's in getting the first dose of his consolidation round of chemo. His meds are a little different than mine were, but the main one, Cytarabine or something close to that, is the same.

It shouldn't affect him for a couple days unless there's an initial reaction.

No news on Dump's heart problem yet. I suspect he's still researching it. On Wednesday, I think I'll visit the infusion center and see if they'll let Jerry have a visit from me.

My News

I was wrong yesterday. They're not trying to undo the effects of last week's chemo. They're really just trying to keep my counts up even while the chemo is working. So there's this battle going on right now between the Cytabarine and whatever else I got last week and the Neulasta shot I got on Saturday.

Since my neutrophil count is 24,000, we're actually waiting for it to go down, not up. Sometime in the next 2-3 weeks, my WBC should stabilize at a much lower number, then go up.

At that point I get switched to "priority" status, and I get a two-day evaluation from the transplant team.

The nurse told me this morning that it's possible to go from the two-day evaluation to the beginning of the transplant treatment in one week.

So I am on the fast track.

Hopefully Going Just a Little Deeper ...

Last night, my aunt put the following on Facebook:

Following my nephew's blog through my gmail has made it possible to keep up with his journey through Leukemia without coming to facebook on a daily basis ~ which was helpful during the last month while spending so much more time on caring for lil JJ and her 'bad bug'. Paul Pavao keeps me inspired, especially when I get to feeling that this 'is all too much for me'

I had a cousin in a dangerous motorcycle wreck recently. My grandmother, age 88, is in ICU right now with pneumonia. My aunt, who's caring for a small child with a "bad bug," is over 70. I wrote recently about a teenage girl with a virus that has paralyzed her from the neck down.

In the meantime, I'm typing blogs, exercising, helping home school my children, meeting new people, and praying about my best role in building the body of Christ in a new city.

Not exactly deep suffering.

Yes, I might have a time bomb inside me waiting to go off and send me to unhindered fellowship with the Spirit of God, but since the grace of God has ensured that we've spent no time worrying about such blessings, there's just not a lot of suffering going on.

But, if my story is going to inspire people doing worthwhile work, like my aunt with her great granddaughter, then I intend to keep writing. This isn't about me overcoming. This is about us overcoming.

A friend visited yesterday and spent some time talking about the care that God has for people. If Jesus Christ was willing to die and suffer for us, then he attached some great importance to us. (I know there's plenty of Americans who don't believe Jesus was God's Son nor that he died for us, but this is addressed to those who do.)

Personally, I believe our potential is very close to unlimited. Most of us just need to know that our efforts have a decent chance of producing results.

They do.

To me, Jesus didn't die because we're so wicked that God's anger had to be appeased by his death. To me, Jesus died because we were hopeless, helpless, and powerless on our own. How many of us don't know how to break our addictions, our laziness, our daily habits, and the feeling that we're just not that important in the great scheme of things?

So we go on and on, not knowing how to change.

Jesus died to turn the sons and daughters of men into the sons and daughters of God.

Jesus died to enable us to do what we thought we couldn't do. He died to make our dreams, wishes, and hopes of being a positive, powerful, life-transforming influence on those who meet us a reality.

So if I can inspire just a few other people to be hopeful, empowered, and influential, then I want to do that. This isn't about me going through some great endeavor and succeeding. This is about us going through whatever the Lord God Almighty has put in front of us, never giving up, and coming out on the other side with the rewards we never dared believe we could get.

We always thought those were for other people.

But they're for us.